Making of "Perfect Mom" Documentary
- 2 days ago
- 3 min read
Making “Perfect Mom”
I have always felt that there are stories happening around us that don't get talked about enough.
Motherhood is one of them.
We see mothers managing everything. Children, homes, jobs, businesses, careers, families. And somehow, somewhere, there is this invisible expectation that they should be able to do all of it perfectly.
I wanted to understand what happens behind that picture.
So I made a documentary called “Perfect Mom.”
Not because I had found the perfect mother.
But because I realised there is probably no such thing.
Six mothers. Six very different stories.
For this film, I met six mothers.
And none of their stories were the same.
One mother had left her job to become a full-time mother.
Another was raising two children while working as a lawyer, trying to keep up with a demanding career and motherhood at the same time.
One had left a conventional job and started her own business. She was doing well, building something of her own, while also wanting to be present for her children.
Another had taken a long break from her career.
And one mother spoke about postpartum depression — something that can make you question yourself in ways that are difficult to explain to anyone who hasn't experienced it.
Her story stayed with me.
She spoke about believing in yourself again. About how things can get better.
None of these women had a formula.
And that was probably the most important thing I learnt.
There is no perfect solution
While filming them, I kept coming back to the same thought.
We are constantly looking for the right way to do motherhood.
Should you continue working?
Should you take a break?
Should you build a career?
Should you stay at home?
Should you start something of your own?
Should you give more time to your children?
The truth is, I don't think there is one answer.
Every mother is figuring it out with the circumstances she has.
And sometimes what works today may not work tomorrow.
That doesn't make her a bad mother.
It makes her human.
Why I didn't give the film an ending
This was probably the most intentional decision I made while making the documentary.
I didn't want to tell mothers what they should do at the end.
I didn't want a voiceover saying, “And this is how you become the perfect mom.”
Because I don't know.
And neither do these six women.
They are all still figuring it out.
So I left the ending open.
Maybe you will have your own answer after watching it.
Maybe you won't.
And that's okay too.
The making of the film
The film itself was quite simple to make.
There was no big production setup.
I travelled to each mother's home and filmed her in her own space.
That was important to me.
I didn't want to create a polished version of motherhood. I wanted to see the spaces where these women actually lived their lives.
And filmmaking has a funny way of reminding you that things don't always go according to plan.
There were moments when I was literally filming on a bathroom bucket.
Yes. A bathroom bucket.
Sometimes you just work with what you have.
I travelled from one house to another, carrying my equipment, finding corners to shoot in, figuring out the light, listening to stories and trying not to interfere too much.
The filming took about five days.
The editing took another five.
But the film had actually started much before I picked up the camera.
It started with a question.
What does it really mean to be a “perfect mom”?
Maybe you are doing better than you think
I don't think this documentary has an answer.
That wasn't the point.
I made it because I had seen how easy it is for mothers to feel that they are falling short.
Someone else seems to be doing better.
Someone else has a better career.
Someone else's children seem happier.
Someone else seems to have everything under control.
But we rarely see the whole story.
These six mothers reminded me of that.
Behind every decision is a reason.
Behind every break is a story.
Behind every successful career is a struggle we may not see.
And behind every mother who looks like she has it all together, there may be days when she is simply trying to get through the day.
So if you are a mother and you have ever felt that you are not doing enough, I hope this film gives you one small thing.
The feeling that you are not alone.
There is no perfect solution.
There may not even be a perfect mom.
Maybe there are just mothers, doing the best they can, changing, learning, starting again — and figuring it out along the way.
And perhaps that is enough.
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